Theocrat(s) of the Week
First, a little background: Al Mohler, president of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary was recognized by Our Distinguished Panel of Judges a few weeks ago for his declaration that Mormons are not Christians; building on his previous declaration that the Roman Catholic office of the papacy is "unbiblical." No good theocrat can make it without the capacity to call-out the unorthodoxy, heresy and apostacy of others. Mohler said Mormonism cannot be considered orthodox Christianity because the religion rejects historic Christianity. "Christianity is rightly defined in terms of `traditional Christian orthodoxy,'" And
"Thus, we have an objective standard by which to define what is and is not Christianity." Previously he had said: "As an evangelical, I believe the Roman church is a false church and it teaches a false gospel," ... "I believe the pope himself holds a false and unbiblical office." Not to be out-orthodoxed by a Baptist, Pope Benedict XVI put the Offices of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, (formerly known as the Office of the Inquisition) on the case. They declared this week that in fact it is the Catholic Church that is truly orthodox -- them and maybe the Eastern Orthodox churches. But everybody else is wrong and cannot even be considered churches. Now, Pope Benedict XVI has a certain advantage in this: He is the head of a theocratic state himself and he's got papal infallibility going for him. For his part, Al Mohler may believe himself to be absolutely right, but he would be the first to declare his is not infallible, what with being a Baptist and all. Mohler does have a point however, that there is nothing in the Bible about the papacy. On the other hand, there is nothing in there about the Southern Baptist Convention either: so by the Mohler standard, his own denomination is "unbiblical" as is the office of president of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. (Memo from Our Distinguished Panel of Judges to the theocratically inclined: be careful what standard you use to measure your orthodoxy.) Pope Benedict XVI won the nod from Our Distinguished Panel of Judges for his refusal to be out-orthodoxed. Sen. David Vitter (R-LA) has been much in the news of late, having been exposed as a consumer of prostitution services from New Orleans to Washington, DC -- for much of his married life. Vitter is Catholic, and is a member of St. Francis Xavier Church, in New Orleans. Much has been made about the hypocrisy of Vitter, (and the political party that supports him) having made the sanctity of marriage a centerpiece of his political philosophy and legislative agenda -- while he has led a shadow life marked by serial infidelity with hookers. The Nation magazine editorialized: Vitter, in yet another delicious slice of religious right hypocrisy, is one of the most outspoken social conservatives in the Senate. He co-sponsored legislation to federally finance abstinence-only education and called a ban on gay marriage the most important issue in the country today. He also told the New Orleans Times-Picayune that "infidelity, divorce, and deadbeat dads contribute to the breakdown of traditional families." By that standard, Vitter ought to be being seen as a leading covert operative engaged in the "breakdown of the traditional family." But Vitter is a man who was not alone at his moment of shame. Jeanne Maier, the New Orleans madam, according to the AP: told the Times Picayune she came forward to help Vitter, after seeing the one-dimensional representation of him in the wake of the D.C. Madam announcement. It has also been reported (as well as denied) that Vitter enjoyed a diaper fetish when he frequented the Canal Street brothel in New Orleans. All this was prior to his more recent patronage of the DC Madam -- who CBS News reports called him during voting in the Senate. It has not been reported exactly what services he purchased from the DC Madam. Such revelations might ruin another pol, causing him to resign and get out of public life. But so far, Vitter seems determined to stick it out -- in the sense of remaining in office, that is. Apparently the last time his serial infidelity with hookers came-up, his wife threatened a sanction worthy of certain ancient and modern theocratic states: She threatened to Bobbitt him. Our Distinguished Panel of Judges notes that Bobbitting is not, to their knowledge, a sanction in any known theocratic sect, state, or faction -- but since Vitter reports that God has forgiven him, we are left to wonder which God or Goddess that might be. By now you may be wondering, how does all of this qualify Sen. Vitter as the co-recipient of the coveted Theocrat of the Week award? How can a man who has sunk so low for so long merit such an accolade from Our Distinguished Panel of Judges? The answer is simple. The personal moral code of a theocratic polititian need not be consistent with his public policy goals. His theocratic backers can forgive him his sins -- as long as he continues to work, as he has, to form a more theocratic union. Our Distinguished Panel of Judges believes that Senator Vitter merits his co-Theocrat of the Week award for having overcome (so far) the extraordinary humiliation of exposure of his double life -- to return to the Senate and continue with theocratic business as usual.
Theocrat(s) of the Week | 1 comment (1 topical, 0 hidden)
Theocrat(s) of the Week | 1 comment (1 topical, 0 hidden)
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